What are the things that make us happy couples? It’s not the bling, cash, gems, or any other worldly valuables. There are a bunch of other little things that we do every day to add value to our relationship and our love. That’s what keeps our relationship alive and helps it from falling apart. But, sometimes, even after a million moments spent together, even after you’ve committed to each other, there seems to be an invasion of a gloomy cloud that wreaks havoc in our relationship. It makes us wonder what went wrong. After all, we were so happy with each other and suddenly, the communication has ceased to just exist, our bedtimes have changed, we don’t see each other a lot, and there’s an aura of disinterest and detachment.
Then comes the sudden entry of the storming-out-of-door kind of fights, silent treatment, shouting matches, and the endless blame game. So, how does one stay happy in a relationship? What’s the secret to making happiness last till eternity? We did some groundwork for the couples amongst us and found the answers to these ever-haunting questions.
Turns out that, it’s all about following these ground rules:
1. Focus On What’s Right Rather Than What’s Wrong
Does he leave the towel on the bed? Does she leave the heater on after a shower? Do they always forget to call you when they are out with friends? Okay, we agree these could trigger you, but that doesn’t mean they don’t love you, right? They make sure that you are happy, they make sure that you are safe, they care about your needs, they make you laugh, they hear you rant about your colleagues, they are your warm blanket of love and comfort when the cold breeze of life’s problems hits you. They are the one you love and the one who loves you. When there’s so much right, why focus on the wrong? Nobody’s perfect, so blur the things that are wrong and unnecessary and focus on the frame that captures your happiness and love.
2. Incorporate The Following Phrases In Your Routine
Good morning and good night texts might seem annoying when random people send them to you in WhatsApp groups. But, when it comes from someone you love, it can make the day. Say “I Love You,” in whatever language, form, gestures, or actions. Say it again, and again. Say sorry when you’re in the wrong. Ask your partner how their day was, and listen to every detail that they give you. Most importantly, appreciate your partner for their love, support, care, and concern.
3. Respect Each Other
The most important of all, that ranks above sexual attraction, good looks, shared goals, and a whole lot of love is — “respect.” The only thing that can hold you and your partner from having unreasonable fights, and crossing the line and hurting each other is unerring respect for each other. Respect each other, for your partner and you are intertwined. Never let your self-respect sink, and never speak ill of your partner to him or others. Remember that you both love each other, and always hold high regard for each other.
4. Have Meaningful Conversation And Don’t Communicate Superficially
Be honest and talk about everything, with no holds barred. Especially, about the stuff that hurts. If there’s something that’s bothering, say it out loud and clear. None of us here is a mind reader. We all have a lot running in our minds to actually be able to fathom the other person’s unsaid thoughts. It’s not just about the 2-minute conversations that brush up on each other’s mood or about what the other wants to eat for dinner. It’s about the fears, the jealousy, the insecurity, the career problems, life problems — it’s about every silly thing and every significant thing. Talk it out and you’ll see how magically your relationship improves.
5. Embrace Change And Growth
This is something that Einstein said, “The only thing that is constant is Change.” And we dare not say that he is wrong. We all need to understand that our sweethearts are not going to be the 20-year-old, flirty, romantic, and sexually charged person for the rest of their lives. It’s not just the romance that’s going to change, there will be a change in commitment to career, and their social lives will change too. As long as the change is inclined towards personality development, it should be welcomed and embraced.
Some Don’ts That You Should Keep In Mind:
- Never fight over text.
- Don’t expect too much
- Never Neglect Yourself
- Don’t Control Your Partner
Well, happy and healthy relationships are those that are based on foundations of transparency and comfort. Hold these two founding qualities close to the heart and you will see your relationship flow like a river, surely to the sea, and you won’t be able to stop yourself from falling in love with each other, just like Elvis Presley once said.